Tuesday, December 24, 2019
It s Come A Long Way From The First Draft - 1477 Words
This is the final draft of the essay. Itââ¬â¢s come a long way from the first draft. The details are present and the thread is more clear. At least to me, the writer, it is. Iââ¬â¢m proud of the elements Iââ¬â¢ve chosen and of the way Iââ¬â¢ve chosen to connect them. The use of freedom as a thread was difficult, yet the perfect challenge I needed. I love my thread, yet Iââ¬â¢m not super confident in my imagery within the piece. I tried to incorporate more sensual imagery, but only accomplished visual imagery, a little bit of touch and smell. Iââ¬â¢m proud of this piece merely because I managed to connect two things I absolutely love (nature and equine) with an issue we still face in this world, acceptance of others, ourselves and racism. Racism was displayed in the freedom taking of another man. Never did I think I would be able to connect these 4 completely different ideas in such a simple, yet complex way and absolutely love it. Iââ¬â¢ve never been more excited about of a piece of writing and allowing people to read it than I am with this piece. There are so many things Iââ¬â¢m proud of with this writing, but there are a few things I feel Iââ¬â¢m weak in. Iââ¬â¢m not quite sure everyone will agree with my thread being present throughout my entire essay, although I think it is, but maybe thatââ¬â¢s because I wrote. Iââ¬â¢m not quite sure if the repetition of the words ââ¬Ëfreeââ¬â¢ and ââ¬Ëfreedomââ¬â¢ were effective or really necessary. And the imagery as I already said. Iââ¬â¢m lacking the sense of taste as how do I represent taste withShow MoreRelatedI Am A Great Deal Of Anxiety Essay1145 Words à |à 5 Pagesafter reading the three articles Donald M. 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